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My Post-baby Bounce Back (or NOT!)

baby blues body love body positive bodypositive post baby post baby bounce back post baby clothes post baby diets post baby girdle post baby tummy post baby weight loss pregnancy social media stretch marks waist trainer

I was asked to write a post about post-baby bodies and I guess I am going to attempt to be as uncensored and as honest with you as I can be. And while my son is screaming on my lap...I am going to start my story from the beginning.

When I found I was pregnant at the age of 24, he was not planned nor was it something that I would ever wanted to happen. Being pregnant of course has been the best thing that's ever happened to me. However like many women, I started this journey with rose tinted Elton John glasses.

While pregnant, my goals for my post body were the norm (well so I thought). I planned that I would give birth and then the diet would begin. I would buy a waist trainer to help build back up muscle memory. I would be breastfeeding so I'd be losing pounds while I pumped and by the time my son was 3months then POW! I'd be back to my post baby glory days.

Oh how unrealistic and unfortunately so far from what actually happened. By the time I gave birth (I had a natural birth with no drugs) my body was in shock, incredibly sore and totally unrecognisable.

The weeks that followed were filled with sleepless nights, eating whatever and whenever I found the time, worrying about why my son wasn't taking to breastfeeding and why my boobs were so sore, instead of if I had lost some pounds or not.

This was the bare faced, unfiltered truth about motherhood. Five months on, my weeks haven't changed much from the first few. I sleep when I can, try to minimise the amount of times my son hits his head on the floor and what he puts in his mouth, as well as sorting out the washing and bottles.

And this is not to say that I've stopped caring about how I look- far from the truth.

I often find myself staring at myself in the mirror manhandling the saggy and stretch mark ridden skin that was my flat stomach. Trying to analyse if I need a boob lift or not, how effective laser treating
off my stretch marks would really be. I torture myself by trying to fit my now huge ass into post baby jeans I know aren't comfortable. Wearing Spanx everyday so when I look at myself I see a flat stomach or demanding to have sex in the dark with my partner because I can't bear how I look. 

I've done and lived through it all but what bothers me and what I want to ask myself is why do I feel like this? Why do I feel an utter failure that by having not regained my post baby figure in 5 months, I feel like I've utterly failed as a woman, a girlfriend and as a representation of young mothers? Could I be suffering from post-baby body dysmorphia (this isn't a real term, or a word in a medical dictionary) but it is a word that explains exactly how I feel and something I've come to realise I struggle with.

What caused my perception? My two main suspects in helping me create these self-hating feelings is celebrity culture and social media, while I was pregnant I researched various Instagram pages and celebrity websites. Why? Well I wanted to know how easy/ hard it was to get my body back to bikini ready shape after the baby was born. Of course the endless lists and photo's of celebrity mums and celebrity post-baby diets flooded my timeline.
How am I supposed to keep up with Tammy Hembrow (Australian Instagram bombshell) who is amazingly beautiful by the way but had no sign of even being pregnant when her son was 1 month and fitted straight back into a bikini within two months? How are we as women suppose to keep up with women like Beyoncé who are doing live shows when their babies are three months? Sexy outfits and booty shaking still aren't even on my radar. Kim Kardashian who was post baby fit and baring it all for us to see within 6months. The list of amazing post baby bounce backs is endless...

Before I had my son I was adamant that these women were no different from me. I'm in fact younger than Beyoncé and Kim. I'm pretty active, eat pretty healthy and never had a problem with my body weight or shape in my life. Now post-baby, I realise we can't compare ourselves to these women because we are not meant to. Doing so is mental suicide and it will result in self-hate over something that is perfectly normal. Every body is different, every body copes with pregnancy differently and every body carries a baby differently.

Besides, if we all had a full team of nannies, dieticians, hair and makeup, personal trainers and chefs, I too would be twerking in a string bikini before I could say "stretch marks". I wouldn't be half as tired as I am and I would probably be able to stick to a strict diet and regime without me having to cook the nearest thing possible before my son wakes up from his nap. I admire women who work out everyday for hours, but I honestly am too tired and already feel that carrying a 5month old up and down two flights of stairs daily is a good enough work out for me.
The morale of this blog post is I need/ we need to be proud ourselves regardless of what our bodies look like for now. We are women who do it ALL with/without nannies, personal trainers or dieticians.
We are women who slowly but surely pace ourselves and work on our bodies daily. We keep our goals in mind and don't beat ourselves up if we don't reach it. We will fit back into those bikinis (and if not, just buy new ones) and we will have sex with the lights on again! My boyfriend's favourite saying is "patient man rides donkey" *imagine this with a Jamaican accent* and for the first time in our relationship, he's actually right. So as we ride our donkies to post baby body heaven, I hope this post uplifts some of you because you are doing an amazing job. By doing this, I’m getting to vent my feelings to you, which has defiantly helped me feel better about myself.

Cheers to us!

Azana X
Thanks to Azana for sharing her experience and we would love your opinion on the topic or any experiences you have had or seen others go through. It is also a time to ask questions if you are a mother to be or know someone who is. Don't forget to sign up to our newsletter for more interesting topics we will be covering including some guest writers! 


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  • Linah on

    Yes being a mum is the best thing ever. I have a tattoo on my tummy nothing fancy just a horizontal line. Every time I see my babys I forget about all the pain I went through. Summer is coming soon so I hope to get my body back so I have set my self a challenge to train for a one of the marathons and do it.

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